Saw some weird stuff this week

Posted by E-George on September 7, 2007

1. On the drive to work on Tuesday I saw a girl lift a magazine picture of Sean “P-Diddy” Combs up and kiss it.
2. Yesterday some stranger on a Yamaha R6 popped a wheelie at me. Clearly Captain Dingaling, founder of the I Want To Die Horribly In Interstate Traffic Fan Club for Men, wanted to be noticed, and, having no other immediate resource than his motorcycle, used it as his campaign platform for nearby females to observe his superior brand of virility. Had his face shield been up, I’m sure we would have all heard the mating call of the Southwestern Imbecilic Male, “WHOOO HOOO!!”
3. Today I was walking back to my car when I was panhandled by some strange looking young man who looked like he’d been beaten savagely by the heroin stick. After understanding that I had no money he then asked where the sports stadium was. I told him. Then he asked where the Muslim Mosque was. I told him. Then he told me he was Muslim. I nodded politely. Then he asked what time it was. I told him. He then took off down the sidewalk in a rather erratic and uncoordinated lope and wove his way directly into the nearest convenience store. I guess he had time for a pit stop before noon prayers.
4. Today I saw an SUV swerve gently onto the shoulder median for the sole purpose of smashing flat a prairie dog that had wandered too close to the road. Got the dog, too, as far as I could tell.
5. Also today I saw a panhandler at the Tramway off ramp with a man-sized cardboard poster which read:
   “WAS ROBBED. Have no one to call. Trying to get home to family in Amarillo. TEXAS. I need $46 for bus ticket. PLEASE HELP. GOD BLESS!”
   Loosely translated, I think this sign reads,
   “I’ve drank this town dry. Wish to go to Texas and drink it dry. Need $20 for booze, and $26 for bus ticket. GOD BLESS!”

Filed Under: Thank you, and GOOD NIGHT! - Comments:



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